Proton begins

The first day of proton.  I always find the build up to treatment difficult.  You’re in a strange limbo period where you have no focus, rather just passing through each day as you wait impatiently for things to get going again.  With this lack of focus, you’re mind starts to wonder and you get drawn away from being ‘in the moment’, something that helps keep the anxieties at bay.

The first day of radiotherapy marked the beginning of the final chapter of Zac’s treatment.  The plan was that, during the week, we would alternate between me and Seb in taking Zac to the WPE hospital for his appointment.  He would need to be nil by mouth in preparation for his general anaesthetic, so the night before we would make up a little lunchbox for him to have on awakening.  As soon as he’d come around from the anaesthetic and was feeling ok, we were free to bring him home. 

The German doctors and nurses were great.  They would make a fuss over Zac, allowing him to sit in the ‘spaceship’ (hospital bed) and press the special button for his ‘magic sleep’, which would send him off within seconds.  Once the treatment was over, we would be called down to sit with him so that he would wake up and see us, as if we’d never left his side.